Oh, by the way, I’m not new to the group but I’ve been lurking for a while. To be honest, I never thought I’d post anything. Too busy. And besides, it’s not my style. Or so I thought. This guy has my brain going in circles.

Frankly, if I were by myself and met him at a bar, it would be a no-brainer. I’m not into one-night stands though for him I’d make an exception. But that he knows my sister, and will be meeting my parents and brother tonight, complicates everything. I’m definitely not interested in anything long-term. Anyway, he’s not someone who’s in the game plan. No one is, really. I’ve been lucky. My career is taking off. A social life? What’s that?

I’m a lawyer and due in court in six hours. I’m so tired. I truly wish I could sleep. But that’s not going to happen. And now I’m rambling. Enough. If anyone is out there with some advice or even to confirm that I’m totally out of my mind, I’d appreciate it.

Thanks for reading this.

D

DAKOTA STARED at her laptop’s screen for a moment. She was tempted to erase the e-mail. Writing it had been therapeutic—she didn’t need to send it. Nor did she really need a reply. Nothing anyone could write would make her act on her impulse to spend a carte blanche night with Tony. She was too chicken to do anything like that. Not to mention that her family knew him. Or they would by tonight.

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard. What did she have to lose? If she were to get a response, at least it would be something to do since she couldn’t sleep anyway. Besides, what would it hurt to get some feedback? She pressed the send button before she could change her mind again.

After setting the laptop on her nightstand, she got rid of one of the pillows she’d stacked behind her back and plumped the remaining one before sliding down, cradling her head in it and staring at the shadowy ceiling.

How totally bizarre was it to e-mail a bunch of women she didn’t know—well, in a way she knew them. After hours and hours of reading their uncensored, heartfelt outpourings, she knew them, all right. Maybe even better than their friends and family.

Sheer genius had inspired the concept for the Eve’s Apple Web site. Membership was simple. If there’s a guy you’re hot after you qualify. Not the right guy, in fact, more likely the one you absolutely wouldn’t take home to Daddy. But he’s also the guy you can’t stop thinking about. You know you have to have him just so that life can get back on track. So that you could eventually settle down with Mr. Right and not have to wonder. Posting was like going to a twelve-step meeting. Anonymous so you could really vent, and everyone there really got it. They shared experiences, and gave advice when asked. Kind of like free therapy.

Odd how she could put it all out there for these strangers, but not talk to Dallas about Tony. Not that her sister would disapprove. On the contrary, she’d likely urge Dakota to go for it. But that was the difference between them. Dallas did whatever she wanted. Family expectations meant little to her. Not Dakota. Always the good girl, she’d even followed in her father’s and brother’s footsteps.

But it wasn’t a sacrifice. She loved the law. In fact, she adored everything about her job. Dakota Shea for the defense, Your Honor—was her favorite expression. She wouldn’t change any of it. Her social life, on the other hand, was a joke. If she could even call having a drink once every other week at the local lawyers’ hangout a social life. Oh, and dinner at her parents’ Tarrytown house one Saturday a month.

She closed her eyes, praying for sleep. When it wouldn’t come, she tried thinking about work, mentally preparing herself for her court appearance in a few hours. But the distraction only lasted a few minutes before her thoughts drifted back to tonight. Back to Tony.

Groaning, she rolled over onto her side and grabbed the pillow she’d discarded. Comfortably sitting up again, she placed her laptop in front of her. She turned it on and saw she had a new e-mail. Good God, someone from Eve’s Apple had already replied.

To: LegallyNuts@EvesApple.com

From: BabyBlu@EvesApple.com

Subject: Losing it

Hey, D, just read your post. Yeah, I’m an insomniac, too. And we share another similar problem. A guy. Go figure. While it’s not too late for you though, I’ve already blown my chance.

You see, I was once exactly where you are. Worried about my career, worried about what my parents thought (I’m Jewish, he isn’t), worried about having all the right accoutrements to my upwardly mobile life.

Dakota stopped reading. Similar problem? Where had this woman—Dakota glanced down at the name—Carson, gotten all this crap? Rather large assumption. Dakota hadn’t mentioned anything of this nature. None of it applied. Not really. Okay, so maybe her parents were an issue, to the extent that they’d had a vision for her early on, encouraging her to study law and now strongly hoped that she’d eventually become a judge. Just a minor issue. It wasn’t as if she allowed them to govern her life. Sure, she relished their approval but what child didn’t?