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My Ice Prince
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Морион Анна

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– Misha!

– No!

Mum sighed heavily, but walked away from my room.

I stared at the laptop monitor again.

«What kind of life is this? I'm young, I'm beautiful, I have a personal bank account in which my parents deposited huge amounts of euros before I was born, but I can't touch anything I own! I am eighteen years old, I will be nineteen in five months and I still live with my parents, I have no friends except my laptop and music centre, I have hardly ever been in society, among humans and vampires. Even at one of the prestigious English schools I studied online and I've never once been there physically! I can only sit in our huge Art Nouveau house, walk in the garden artificially created especially for me, ride my bike… And that's it. No, I can go to Prague, but I can live in my sister's castle so she can keep an eye on me. How humiliating! We live in the twenty-first century, and my parents still can't understand the rules of modern life, where girls my age go to colleges and universities, arrange their personal lives and find friends. My parents do not realise that I am not like themselves: more than five centuries stand between us, and they will never understand me, a daughter of the modern world. What they consider a right earned, an age-old right, I consider a natural right. Of course, it is easy for them to say that I don't understand them and they don't understand me because I am spoilt, and despite this delusion, my family cherishes me, almost deifies me. I am kept like a nightingale in a golden cage: I am supplied with blood, gadgets, universal love, and I have everything except one thing: freedom of choice. Fortunately, at least they let me buy my own clothes. Although, no – even clothes I buy online because I'm not allowed to go to the shops. And how did my precious family let me go to the Czech Republic and travelling there with Cedric? It's amazing! Their heads must have been full of Mariszka's wedding! – I thought with a bitter smile. – But maybe Cedric is right? He said that if I want to earn her trust, I need to stop acting like a child… Yes, he's right! After all, that makes sense! The problem is that it will be hard for me to get rid of my role, hard to be myself, but I have to do it!»

I turned off the music and decided to talk to my mum once more, but this time in a mature way: she and I are real. The real Misha, not the hysterical Misha.

Mum was sitting in her office going through some papers, but as soon as I entered the office, she took her eyes off the papers and looked at me with a smile.

– I want to talk» I said in a calm tone as I walked to her desk and sat down on the chair next to it.

Mum smiled affectionately once more and put the papers aside.

– 'Of course, sweetheart. About what?

I felt irritated again: the word «sweetheart» instead of my name put me in the position of a child. But I held back my anger and drew in more air.

– Listen to me, please» I began. – I realise that I am a late child and that I am very young. But I don't think that's an argument for you to disregard my opinion.

– Is this about that again? I thought we'd already settled this» Mum said with a tired smile.

– That's the thing, we haven't. How can I explain it to you? You all don't trust me, and it depresses me. – I considered every word carefully. – You don't believe in my independence, you don't believe that I can decide something on my own, without you: without you, Dad, brothers and sisters.

– Misha, of course, we trust you, but you must understand: in our world, as well as in the human world, there are rules that must be observed by everyone. If everyone acts only according to their own wishes, there will be disorder in the world, and the system built over centuries will collapse. Moreover, you should remember that in our world the rules are immutable, and only thanks to them we can live in peace and successfully hide our existence from mortals. Humans are imperfect, yes, they have a lot of freedom, but they have nothing to hide, and we do.

– I understand this perfectly well, but you should also understand my position: I believe in my own strength and in the fact that I can take care of myself.

– Honey, I'm not saying you can't take care of yourself. I'm saying that you can't do it yet, because of your age. You have to accept that. You have a lot to learn: everything we have achieved is the result of effort, hardship, training and exercise.

– So teach me all that! – I objected.

– It's too early for you to learn it: the first killings are shocking, so you have to be prepared for them, first of all, mentally.

– I am ready for it. I realise it's the only way we can feed ourselves.

– That's not what I'm saying: you're still too inexperienced, but you'll learn everything in due time.

I sighed heavily: «in due time!»

I had thousands of arguments and beliefs running through my head, but I couldn't put them into words, as if I didn't have enough vocabulary, even though I loved to read.

– Well, I'm willing to accept that. But I don't understand why you won't let me go to Oxford. – I persisted.

Mum stopped smiling and her face became very serious.

– Because I'm afraid for you» she replied.

I raised my eyebrows in surprise.

– You're afraid of something I'm not? – There was no limit to my surprise.

– Exactly.

– But it's wrong: if you don't let me go, I'll never be independent. You let Mariszka go to the Sorbonne when she was nineteen.

– Mariszka is a different story. Her youth was in a different era, more peaceful, and yours is in the midst of a million temptations.

– Then you think I am worse than Maria and Mariszka? – I exclaimed unhappily.

– No, not at all! – Mum sighed and took my hands in hers. – I'm afraid you won't be able to understand, but I'll try to explain. We live in a difficult, turbulent and frightening time: temptation and exposure are at every turn. And I want to protect you from them. I don't know how else I can raise you to be a true vampire in this time. You're not strong enough to resist what's around you-you don't have the core that we have, and I want you to stay away from mortals because you're not immune to them yet, and it's hard and painful to get that immunity, and I'm afraid…» Mom stopped talking.

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